Choosing A Mate, 2 of 3

A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD. - Proverbs 18:22 HCSB

Finding a good spouse is truly a gift from the Lord.[1] Yahweh Yireh loves you and He wants what is best for you. Your spiritual health is central to His heart. If you will put God's desires first, He will make sure you get a great marriage partner. By wisely choosing to fear the Lord, and showing Him the reverence and honor that is due Him, you will be protected from potentially devastating decisions.[2]

You need to trust not only God’s ABILITY but His WILLINGNESS to bring you a wonderful spouse. Abraham expressed his trust in God's ability to lead Eliezer to the right woman for his son. This was not wishful thinking, but true faith that had grown out of a long-term intimate relationship with Hashem. Since Yahweh Ra’ah had provided for all his other needs, Abraham knew that the Lord could be trusted in this crucial choice for his son Isaac.[3]

So, spend much time in prayer asking the Lord for the mate He wants for you.[4] Be sensitive to the promptings of the Holy Spirit, while carefully discerning His guidance and your own inner urges.[5] Do not confuse the compulsions of your reproductive system for voice of the Spirit. Whatever you hear from the Spirit will never contradict the Scriptures.

The Word clearly teaches that you must not marry an unbeliever. [6] After all, it makes no sense for the Ransomed to marry unbelievers. Why would you start out a marriage with such a fundamental rift in place? A person who does this is simply asking for trouble.

Even though the apostles Paul and Peter spoke of the possibility of winning an unbelieving spouse to the Lord,[7] that does not mean we should go into marriage knowing we are spiritually incompatible.

That would be like saying, “I know that it is possible for a marriage to survive me having an affair; therefore, it is all right for me to practice that sin.” Or better yet, “I know it is possible that I might survive driving my car off a bridge; therefore, I’ll try.” That’s simply ignorant! Besides, God directly forbids it! So the real question here is, “Will you obey or not?”

Abraham understood that God’s ways were much better than human ways and lived the truth expressed by Solomon: “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths.[8]

Abraham’s faith apparently worked so well that others sought to imitate it. His servant, Eliezer, displayed the same kind of faith when he prayed.[9] Seeking God’s will must not be an esoteric, abstract concept in the minds of the Ransomed. It is a hard, practical thing that is intrinsic to every decision we make.

[1] Proverbs 18:22
[2] Psalm 37:4; 1:7; 2:1-11; Matthew 6:33
[3] Genesis 15:2-6; 24:2-4, 7
[4] Matthew 7:7-11
[5] Acts 8:29; 11:28; 13:2; 21:11; 1 Corinthians 7:12
[6] 2 Corinthians 6:14
[7] 1 Corinthians 7:12-16; 1 Peter 3:1-2
[8] Proverbs 3:5-6
[9] Genesis 24:12